Hot Pizza and Cold Beer

By Saber ShadowKitten
And Now For Something Completely Different 42

Xander's mouth watered as the waitress set the pizza and cheese bread on the table. Steam rose from the round pizza dish, the scent of melted cheese, tomato, and toppings heaven to his nose. He flashed a brilliant smile at the waitress. "Thanks."

"Do you two need anything else?" she asked, passing out small plates and silverware wrapped in napkins.

"Another round of beers would be nice, thanks again," Xander said, turning on the charm. The pizzeria was getting full and he didn't want to be ignored because of it. A little light flirting would prompt the waitress to check on them often, in spite of the crowd.

Spike dished out the pizza and took a tentative bite of his piece. He relaxed. "They didn't bollocks it up," he said around his mouthful.

"Good." Xander sank his teeth into the garlic-less pizza. Flavor exploded in his mouth, making his tastebuds very happy. Xander knew of nothing better than hot pizza and cold beer.

"So, pet, are we camping still?" Spike asked, joyfully munching as well. The waitress returned with their beers and moved off quickly to serve other customers.

"I think that would be best," Xander replied. "My freaky power suckage might react differently on the Hellmouth."

"Has it yet?"

The plate glass window at the front of the Sunnydale Pizzeria shattered suddenly. Screams raised as a decapitated human body sailed into the restaurant. It hit one of the occupied tables, upending it, and sent dishes, pizza, and drinks crashing to the floor.

"Not that I noticed," Xander answered. He reached for the Parmesan cheese. "But I've been pretty isolated the past few days."

"Well, make sure you pay attention," Spike said. "I'd like to be far away if you're going to explode."

"And here I though you'd want a front row seat to my demise."

The door to the pizzeria slammed open, and a very large, very ugly yellow-spined demon stomped inside. Red-eyed, its gaze travelled over the screaming patrons. A forked tongue slid out to taste the air. Clutched in a clawed fist was a severed head, dripping blood and other fluids onto the floor.

"I would watch, if there wasn't a possibility of my being hit with a billion gigawatts of electricity," Spike said. He pulled a napkin out of the dispenser and wiped his mouth. "Having you push it into me now isn't all that pleasant."

"I could stop..."

"Hell, no! Don't do that."

Xander chuckled knowingly and sipped his beer.

The demon roared and people scattered. Tables and chairs were knocked over in the hurry to escape. Children's piercing cries blended with the shattering of plates and bottles as they were knocked to the ground.

The severed head flew across the pizzeria and hit a fleeing patron in the back, sending her sprawling. Snarling, the demon stalked towards her, toenails clicking on the floor.

"So, you like being practically invulnerable," Xander teased. He set his beer aside and attacked his slice of pizza.

"I don't necessarily like it. It's more that I don't have to worry about being dusted," Spike said, swallowing a piece of cheese bread. "I do right by you and the rest of the time I'm free to pursue anything at all, without limitations."

The demon picked up the woman by her hair, snarling and hissing. The woman shrieked, crying for help. The demon's forked tongue shot out and brushed over her cheek.

Xander's dark gaze flicked to the demon, then returned to his table companion. "At least you don't have a Supervamp complex."

Face streaked with tears, the woman briefly looked at Xander and Spike sitting casually in a booth, glanced down at the yellow-spined demon that had abruptly collapsed, then fled from the otherwise empty pizzeria out into the night.

"Somehow I can't picture myself wearing tights and trolleys," Spike chuckled, tilting his beer to his lips.

Xander grinned wickedly, black eyes glittering in the pizzeria's low lights. "I can."