Spike felt like he'd been hit by a falling organ, something he was familiar with experiencing. He really hadn't put two and two together. It's not like he thought about his past all the time. Things came up in conversation and he remembered he'd said or done something related to it way back when.
He remembered something, now. Something that had been said to him at the time of one of those births. " I hope that the future generations of Harrises are blessed with a caring man such as yourself."
Spike dropped his face into his hands with a groan. "I've been cursed."
"Not really explaining things, Spike."
Spike lowered his hands and looked at Xander. "One of your ancestors cursed me. Or, as she put it, blessed me with 'caring for future generations of Harrises.' She must've been a witch."
"Wait, wait, wait. Are you being for real?" Xander said. "You've been 'caring' for my family for generations?"
Spike thought back and, yep, he'd helped every Harris he could remember. "Apparently so."
"Even my father?"
Spike heard the weight in Xander's question and saw the tightening around his lips. "What's his name?"
Spike shook his head after a moment. "No.
There was a
"My grandpa's name was
Spike scowled at him. "No." He stood abruptly, needing to put distance between them. Marching over to the stream, he dug out his cigarettes and lit one. He couldn't believe it. He'd been cursed all this time and hadn't even known it. Fate was certainly messing with him when he'd met up with Xander.
But was that really a bad thing? Spike took a drag from his cigarette and looked up at the sunny September sky. Being a vampire had its perks, but everything he'd gained from Xander was better. So he didn't feel like hunting or feeding anymore. So what? It hadn't hurt him none. And being with Xander was better than being alone, like he'd been after Dru had left him again.
He heard Xander approach, but didn't acknowledge him. Standing beside Spike, Xander tossed some rocks into the stream, listening to them plunk one by one.
Spike shrugged. He took another drag from his cigarette.
"Listen, we've put up with each other for long enough, don't you think? I mean, I know we trust each other, but you can only be with someone for so long before you either become brothers or lovers." Xander tossed another rock into the water. "I can't see you as my brother, Spike."
The words would've hurt, if the way Xander had said them didn't hold a different meaning. "That subject was closed," Spike said.
"I know." Xander shrugged. "But I'm letting the truth hang all out here. You deserve it."
Spike didn't say anything.
He didn't know what to say, anyway.
Eventually, Xander sighed.
"I'm right here."