Excerpts Of Surviving

by Saber ShadowKitten

Part Four

Angel was once more without his soul. Terrifying. Hateful. Out to destroy the one who he had loved above everything. He was a killer who used the love he'd once felt to play with her, for ending her life would be too easy.

He had to make her suffer first. Starting by killing each of her friends.

-excerpt from The Chosen One, by B. William


They traveled. Neither one of them questioned why they were still together, or knew when things officially went from 'you and me' to 'we,' but they didn't care. From city to city, state to state, they used the distance and the time to grieve and to heal.

They slept in the same bed, waking up curled together as the day turned into night. They held each other when they cried, they fought over the radio station and the television remote, they found laughter in extreme sadness and depression. They both wanted to survive.

Spike bought a laptop, much to Buffy's surprise, and began writing in the car when it was her turn to drive. Their destinations were never planned, they just went and viewed the sights wherever the road led them. When asked, the blond vampire told her he was chronicling their travels. In reality, he was writing that epic.

He wanted the world to know the strength and sacrifice that one girl had made for everyone. He hadn't lied when he said he was proud of her. He wouldn't have been able to stick a sword through Drusilla no matter what the consequences, and he doubted anyone else could have, either.

As the time passed, and the pain lessened, their relationship started to change. Which one of them initiated the first non-comforting touch was unknown to either of them. But the passion that underlined each of their beings ignited with a fury, and burned both of them to the core. Long gone was Master and Slayer, vampire and human. In their places were lovers and companions, and they wouldn't want it any other way.

It had been five years since they'd left Sunnydale and neither of them looked back, until the day came when they ran into a demon who helped to balance the forces of good and evil. He told them that it was time to face the past and stop running. That night, they cried.

The next night, they started back to Sunnydale.


Buffy clutched to her chest the first edition of 'her' book, signed by the author who was beside her, as they stood in front of the sign that read 'Welcome to Sunnydale.' The inscription read: 'To the bravest, strongest and most heroic woman anyone will ever not know. Here's your epic, Bucket. Love, Spike.'

The blond vampire had finished the story less than a year before and had found a publisher in New York. The Chosen One, by B. William, had become an instant bestseller when it hit the bookstores. Not a single critic disliked it, the publishing company couldn't print enough copies and no store could keep it in stock. Buffy had a box full in the trunk of their De Soto, still running in top condition after even all the miles they put on it. She planned to give each one to her old friends, every one filled with a personal message written on the inside cover.

"Are you ready, Bucket?" Spike asked, staring at the sign with as much trepidation as she undoubtably felt.

"No," Buffy replied. "I don't want to do this."

"Me either," he said. "But Whistler was right, we have to face the past to move onto the future."

"You sound like a shrink," she said, tearing her eyes from the sign to look at him.

"I need to see one to figure out why I'm still with you," he replied, meeting her eyes with a small half-grin.

"Ha-ha, funny-man," Buffy said. "Go find something to eat. I'll get us a room at the motel and meet you there."

"Will do, pet," Spike said. He reached out and caressed her cheek. "We can do this, Bucket. We're survivors, remember?" Buffy nodded and he leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the lips. "See you at the motel."

"Be careful," she warned. "We don't know if the Slayer is here or not. I kind of like having you un-living."

He gave her a cocky grin and sauntered off, leaving her in front of the sign. She returned her eyes to it and sighed. "Welcome to Sunnydale," she said to herself. "Welcome home."


"This was waiting for us at the desk," Buffy said as soon as Spike entered the motel room. She handed him an envelope with both their names on the front.

"What is it?" Spike asked, pulling out the note inside.

"A note from Whistler," she replied. "He says that Giles is expecting our call."

Spike looked at her in surprise. "I gather this means they knew we were coming."

"Guess so," she said. "Makes me wonder what else they know."

"There's only one way to find out," he said, holding out the note.


"I'm afraid," Buffy said, standing outside of her old house.

"I am too," Spike told her, taking her hand. In the other arm, he held the box of books.

"But it's time," she said, gripping her copy like a lifeline. She squeezed his hand, then released it to ring the bell. The door opened after a moment, and she was face to face with her mother for the first time in five years.

"Oh my god, Buffy," Joyce said, embracing Buffy instantly. "Oh my baby, my baby, my baby. You've come home."

"I'm so sorry, Mom," Buffy said, hugging her mother back. Tears flowed from both their eyes. "I missed you so much."

"No, I'm sorry," Joyce corrected. "And I missed you so much more."

Reluctantly, Buffy stepped back from her mom and wiped her face, sniffing. She gestured with the hand that held the book. "You remember Spike, right?"

"Hello, Joy-" Spike's greeting was cut off when Joyce went around her daughter and hugged him, too, causing him to almost lose the books.

"Thank you for taking care of my baby," Joyce said.

"Actually, she took care of me," he replied, slightly embarrassed. He looked at Buffy and saw tears streaming down into her beautiful smile. "But you're welcome."

"Well, let's go inside," Joyce said, stepping back from him and wiping her own tears. "Everyone is waiting to see you two."

The Summers' living room was full of people. Each one wore a different expression on their face, and Buffy wanted to run. But then Spike took her hand and she knew everything would be alright because he was at her side. They were survivors.

"Hi," she said nervously.

Willow was first to respond. The redhead launched herself from the couch to embrace Buffy. "Buffy!" she exclaimed. "You're home!"

"Yeah, Willow, I am," Buffy replied, releasing Spike's hand to hug Willow back. The blond vampire stepped back a few feet, allowing the reunion to take place unhampered.

"It's good to see you, Buffy," Xander said, hugging her next. "We missed you."

"I missed you guys, too," Buffy said, her voice choked up. She released Xander and turned to Giles. In less than a second, she was in his arms, holding him tightly. "Giles."

"I know," Giles said. "I know."

Buffy sniffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve, then turned to the other two in the room. "Hi Cordelia, hi Oz."

"Oh, what the hell," Cordelia said, rising from her seat to hug Buffy. "Welcome home."

"Thanks," she replied. Oz gave her a brief hug, as well, then everyone returned to their seats, leaving Buffy standing in the center of the room. She turned to Spike, who was in the doorway, and motioned him to come to her side. "Um, guys. I know you remember Spike. We're kinda..."

"We know, Buffy," Giles interrupted. "Whistler has kept in contact with us about your travels."

"He has?" Buffy said, surprised. Spike set the box of books on the coffee table, then went to stand slightly behind her.

"Yeah," Willow replied. "We were really worried. We didn't know what happened to you. Then one day Whistler came in and told us that you had been given a break from slaying from the 'powers that be' and were taking a vacation. We didn't think the vacation would last five years, though."

"But he did tell us you were with Spike," Xander said. Then added sarcastically, "And that just made us so relieved."

"Well, I'm here, alive, and Spike's harmless...kinda," Buffy said, looking over her shoulder to grin at Spike. "Oh, and we have presents."

She set her copy of the book down on the table and opened the box. She passed them out to the correct person until there was a single one left in the box. That one was for someone she'd never see again.

"Oh my god, it's the book," Cordelia said. "I've been trying to get this for months."

"I've read multiple reviews about this, and I have to say, I am curious as-as to the content," Giles said, studying the cover. "For some reason, it seems to be remarkably similar to the life of a-a Slayer."

"Wow, Buffy," Xander said, holding his copy. "How did you manage to get one for each of us?"

"It helps when you know the author personally," Buffy replied, taking Spike's arm.

"B. William is Spike?" Willow gasped.

Spike shrugged, uncomfortable with the reactions. He wrote the book for Buffy and that was all that mattered to him. "It gave me something to do."

"Well, I'm sure you guys are dying to have me answer questions...," Buffy said.

"Actually, I'd like to read the book," Cordelia interrupted.

"Or want to read the book," she continued with a roll of her eyes. "But it's been a long drive back today, and I'm beat."

"Wait! You can't go!" Willow exclaimed, startling her.

"Why not?" Buffy asked.

"Um..." Willow looked at Giles.

"There is another, er, p-person who wishes to see you," Giles said. "He should be here any moment."

"Who?" Buffy said, frowning in confusion.

"Hello, Buffy."

Buffy felt the world shift under her feet. Slowly, she turned and saw Angel standing in the front hallway. "A-Angel?"

Part Five

The vortex opened behind Angel and her heart cried out in anguish. The demon had told her the only way to close Acathla once he opened was by blood. Angel's blood.

She stepped back and looked into his beautiful brown eyes. "I love you," she told him.

"I love you," Angel replied.

"Close your eyes," she said. He looked at her for a moment, and she nodded in reassurance. When he trustingly closed them, a piece of her died. She leaned forward and kissed him one last time.

Then she thrust her sword through him.

And her Angel was gone.

-excerpt from The Chosen One, by B. William


Buffy stared at the dark-haired vampire in the hallway. She couldn't believe that he was really standing there. She tore her eyes from the apparition and looked back at Spike, who had an equally shocked expression on his face. She reached for him and he brought his eyes to hers. Without a word, he pulled her into his arms and held her tightly as she began to cry, oblivious to his own tears.

Silence permeated the room, no one daring to interrupt what was unfolding before them. After a few minutes, Buffy calmed and stepped back from Spike. She looked up into his teary, blue eyes.

"Go, Bucket," Spike told her softly. "Go to him."

Buffy's eyes brightened with fresh tears as she nodded. Then she turned and ran over to Angel, throwing her arms around him and hugging him tightly. Spike watched as his sire embraced her back, his face a mixture of pain and love. The two broke apart and walked into the dining room for some privacy. Spike used that opportunity to silently slip out the door.

"I'm so sorry, Angel," Buffy said.

"Don't be," Angel replied. "You had to do it and I'm very proud that you did."

"But I sent you to Hell, with your soul," she said.

"It's ok, Buffy," Angel said. "It happened a long time ago. I don't blame you."

"How long have you been back?" she asked.

"A few years," he replied. "Whistler's been keeping us informed of what you've been doing. I never would have thought you'd team up with Spike."

"We're survivors," Buffy said.

Angel reached forward and pulled down the collar of her turtleneck slightly, exposing the bite mark. "And lovers."

"That, too," she agreed. "You're not...upset about that?"

"No," he shook his head. "I already knew and he's taking good care of you, which is all that matters to me."

Buffy blushed. "Do the others know?"

"No, just me," Angel replied. "Whistler's kept me a little more informed than them. I also read Spike's book."

"I didn't even know he wrote it until he gave me the first published copy," Buffy said, smiling at the memory. "He told me he was writing about our traveling." Angel chuckled. "So, what did you think of it? It's kinda our lives printed out for everyone to read."

"I think it shows how much he loves you," Angel said.

She blushed again. "Um...are you sure we read the same book?"

Angel smiled. "Why don't you go ask him and I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"You will still be here tomorrow, right?" Buffy asked.

"I will," Angel replied.

"Ok," she said. "There's a book for you in the box on the table. I wrote it for you, even though I thought I'd never see you again." She gave him a quick hug, then went into the other room. "Where's Spike?"

"Outside," Oz answered.

"Thanks. I'll see you guys tomorrow, ok?" Buffy said. They nodded and said goodnight, and she went out the door.

She found Spike sitting on the steps, computer in his lap, typing. She sat down next to him and laid her head on his shoulder. "What'cha doing?"

"Playing football," Spike replied seriously.

Buffy smacked him on the arm. "Very funny."

"How are things with you and Angel?" he asked.

"Fine," she replied. "He says that you love me."

"Oh really?"


"Guess he's not the bloody idiot that I thought he was," Spike said.

Buffy smiled. "Were you planning on telling me?"

"Yes," he replied simply.

She rolled her eyes and stood. "Come on, Mr. Writer-man. We have a new motel room to christen."

"Just let me save this, Bucket," Spike said.

"'K, I'll be in the car," she replied.

Spike nodded and watched her walk away. His lips curled up in a small smile, and he quickly finished jotting down the idea that he had, then he closed the computer and joined her.


"Are you sure?" she asked, looking up into his blue eyes.

"We're survivors," he replied, pulling her close. "We only need each other," he dropped his head until his lips were an inch away from hers, "and love."

"I think I like the sound of that," she said.

"Good," he said softly. "Because I love you, Bucket."

"I love you, too, Spike," she replied. Then their lips met for the first of many kisses to come.

-excerpt from Survivors, by B. William