Zoro sat in the corner of the aft deck between Robin’s garden and the vent. His katana rested in the corner of his arm. He still sported bandages from his fight against King. Slapping his neck at a bug bite, he shifted and tried to get more comfortable. All he wanted to do was nap so he could heal faster. Instead, his mind kept replaying the latest comment from his crew about Hiyori and he was growing more and more incessed.
When Hiyori mentioned that she’d bathed Zoro while he’d been asleep for a week, it irritated him. What irritated him more were the knowing looks, the coy smiles, and other bullshit that came with the crew thinking he’d had some sort of relationship with her. It happened every time a woman paid undue attention to him.
It was still happening, too, though not from everyone. He’d mentioned he was going to take a bath, and that sea witch Nami would make a sly comment about how maybe he’d prefer a sponge bath. Or Brook would oh-ho-ho that Zoro had been the only one of them to have gotten lucky in Wano. The latest had been Sanji, browbeating him for having taken advantage of a woman like that.
Zoro hadn’t taken advantage of anyone. If anything, it was him who’d been taken advantage of while he’d been out of it. And none of it was true, either. Firstly, because he never did anything with the women that came onto him. Secondly, he didn’t even like women that way. Thirdly, because he was in love with a blond-haired, foul-mouthed, cigarette-smoking chef who had legs up to his ridiculous eyebrows and the strength to take Zoro head on.
Not that anyone knew about it. Nor was he going to tell them. He had thought, once, that Sanji might be showing interest in return, way back on Thriller Bark when they met up with Kumo. But by the time Zoro recovered from his wounds, Sanji had acted like nothing had happened and was his usual asshole self. After their two year separation, Sanji had returned infatuated with the ladies even more. And he’d almost married some woman! No, Zoro had no intention of telling anyone anything.
But they could shut up already about Hiyori and let him be at peace.
Zoro shifted again and resolutely shut his eyes. He was going to stop thinking about it and sleep, damn it.
“Oi, mosshead. It’s your turn to clean the bathroom.”
Zoro grit his teeth. “Go away. I’ll do it later.”
“Nami-san wants it done now, asshole. She wants to use it.”
Zoro’s eyes opened and he glared at Sanji. “Then you do it.”
Sanji stood above him, a long shadow blocking the sun. His black suit, green shirt, and darker green tie were neatly ironed, his goatee trimmed, as if there was someone on the ship worth impressing. His blond hair hung over his right eye, while his left eye narrowed at Zoro. “I will kick your ass all the way to the bathroom if you don’t move it.”
“I’d like to see you try.” Zoro got to his feet, anticipating a fight. He needed to work off his irritation and Sanji could always use a good thrashing. He slid his katanas into the loop at his side and flicked the seal on one, preparing to draw.
He wobbled suddenly as a wave of dizziness overcame him. Sanji moved so fast Zoro hadn’t even seen him do it. Sanji’s arms were around Zoro’s waist, and the two of them stared at each other in surprise and confusion.
“What the–” Zoro started to say. Then, his vision narrowed to a pinprick before going black.
Zoro swam in and out of consciousness. He could hear people talking but wasn’t coherent enough to respond, or even open his eyes.
“...I’m here! I’m here!...”
“...don’t know. Maybe it was something he ate…”
“SANJI’S THROWING OUR FOOD OVERBOARD!”
“...no reaction…”
“Ne, Zoro, I’m bored. Wake up and play cards with me…”
“He’s crashing! Get out of the way!”
“...The fair breeze blew, the white foam flew, the furrow followed free…”
“If you die before you confess that you love me, I’ll kill you.”
“...oi, swordsman-bro, we’re waiting on you…”
“I’m going to start charging you rent on that bed. A hundred Beli every day you lie here!”
“...while I strum my guitar and sing from my heart, why don’t you notice me…”
“...I don’t know. It should’ve worked…”
“It is with honor that I sit vigil at your side…”
“...and it was I who single-handedly defeated one thousand men!”
“...if he never wakes up…”
Zoro felt muggy headed and sore as he swam to consciousness. Every inch of his body hurt, as if he’d been beat up on the inside. He took silent stock of his body parts and everything seemed to be attached. He had no idea what was going on, though. He cracked open his eyelids.
Low lantern light glowed from Chopper’s desk in the infirmary. Chopper’s desk and supplies lined one side of the infirmary. The area was neat and tidy. Zoro lay on the infirmary bed on the opposite side of the room, a drip leading to his arm. A blanket covered him from toes to bare chest. Sitting on the swivel stool beside him, Sanji slept with his cheek on the blanket. An overflowing ashtray balanced on his knee.
Zoro lifted his hand, about to stroke Sanji’s hair, then stopped himself. Sanji must’ve felt the intent, because he awoke abruptly and sat up. He had a blanket crease on his cheek and his hair stuck straight up on that side. His eyes were bleary for a moment before they focused on Zoro. For a second, he appeared elated, then the expression disappeared behind a look of disdain. “‘Bout time you woke up, asshole.”
“Wha–” Zoro croaked, his throat parched. He licked his lips. Even they hurt. “What happened?”
“You got bit by a damned bug, that’s what. Nearly killed you. Pathetic, weak-assed marimo,” Sanji snapped. Zoro noticed Sanji’s hands trembled as he dug his cigarette pack out of his suit coat pocket.
“Oh.” Zoro didn’t know how to respond. That was pathetic. After all the fights they’ve been through, he got bit by a bug and nearly died?
“Yeah.” Sanji tried to shake out a cigarette and found the pack empty. He crushed it in his fist. “I’ll go and get Chopper.”
“Wait.” Zoro grabbed Sanji’s sleeve before he could get up. “How long was I out?”
Sanji stared at the hand on his arm. He inhaled unsteadily. Zoro doubted anyone but himself would have noticed it. “Too long.”
“Is everyone else okay?”
Sanji’s eyes met Zoro. “I wouldn’t let anything happen to them.”
Zoro relaxed. “Good.” He lowered his hand back to his side. He suddenly felt very sleepy.
Sanji rose. “I’m going to get Chopper.”
“M’kay.” Zoro lowered his eyelids. From beneath his lashes, he watched Sanji go to the passthrough door to the galley. Sanji paused on the threshold, looking back to Zoro. The naked emotion on his face made Zoro’s heart catch in his chest.
Sanji disappeared. Zoro opened his eyes again and stared up at the ceiling, baffled. What was that about?
Chopper came bursting into the infirmary just as Zoro was about to drop off to sleep. “Zoro! You’re awake!” The little doctor jumped onto his stool, pulled out a stethoscope, and listened to Zoro’s heart. “I’m so happy!”
“Me, too.” Zoro put up with being poked and prodded, and answered all of Chopper’s questions, before asking one of his own. “What happened?”
“You were bitten in the carotid artery by a toxic pest. We found it in Robin’s garden, dead.” Chopper’s eyes filled with tears. “We didn’t think you were going to make it. I flushed your blood through the machine. At one point your heart gave out.” The tears became sobs and Chopper threw himself onto Zoro’s chest. “You almost died! Wah!”
Zoro awkwardly patted the back of Chopper’s head. “Didn’t though. Thanks to you.”
“Don’t say things like that! I don’t appreciate it at all!” Chopper wiggle-sobbed with mixed distress and delight.
Zoro hn>’d and patted Chopper a few more times. Chopper got up, wiped his face, and hopped off his stool. “I’m going to tell the others you’re awake. Everyone’s been so worried.”
Zoro glanced at the darkness coming through the porthole. “Isn’t it late?”
“No one will care. I’m so glad you’re up, Zoro!” Chopper clapped and scurried from the infirmary.
Within minutes, he was bombarded by the crew, crowding around him and talking at once. Luffy jumped up and down on the end of the bed. Franky and Brook sobbed. Robin rested her hand briefly on Zoro’s arm and squeezed. Jinbe nodded to him. Usopp began regaling the room with a tale of how he saved Zoro’s life, with Chopper clinging to every word. Nami appeared to be doing accounting at the foot of the bed.
Sanji didn’t return.
Zoro was… disappointed. It irritated him. He already knew where he stood with the cook. Why should it matter if he came back or not?
Eventually, Chopper shooed everyone out and gave Zoro orders to sleep. “But you’d better wake up again,” the doctor said, shaking a finger at him.
“I will.” When Chopper hesitated, Zoro added, “Promise.”
Chopper nodded and left the infirmary, closing the door behind him.
Alone, Zoro pillowed a hand behind his head and stared up at the ceiling. A bug? Really? He was going to have to figure out a way to exercise his skin, make it thicker.
With that thought in mind, he drifted off to sleep.
Zoro awoke to find Sanji standing beside him, biting his lower lip, a plate of food balanced on his hand. His expression went from worry to irritation in an instant. “Here’s your breakfast. Chopper said to eat it all.”
Zoro pushed himself further upright, using the wall as a backrest. He felt much better after a solid sleep. “Thanks.”
“I see almost dying gave you manners. How novel.” Sanji handed him the plate. “I’ll be in the galley. If you need something, call.”
Sanji stalked from the room, leaving the door open behind him. Zoro almost called for him immediately, to annoy him, but the smell of food made his stomach growl loud enough to echo. He began shoveling it down. It was the best food he’d ever tasted.
When finished, he let out a huge belch. From the other room, he heard, “Swine.” Zoro grinned.
He swung his feet over the edge of the infirmary bed. He unhooked the drip bag from its place above the bed, and took it and his plate with him into the galley.
“Oi! You’re not supposed to be up!” Sanji disappeared and reappeared next to Zoro in a blink, one arm around his waist, the other taking the plate from him.
Zoro frowned. “How’d you move so fast?”
“It’s something I can do now.” Sanji set the plate on the dining table and began ushering Zoro back to the infirmary. “C’mon, numbskull. Back to bed with you.”
“I don’t want to be in bed anymore.” Zoro cringed inwardly. He sounded whiny.
“Tough shit. You’re going to stay there even if I have to hogtie you to the bed.”
Zoro barked a laugh. “I’d like to see you try.”
Sanji suddenly tensed. His arm around Zoro’s waist stiffened. Zoro’s brow furrowed. “What?”
“Nothing,” Sanji responded shortly. “Let’s get you back to bed.”
Zoro dug his heels in. “No, what?”
“You don’t start moving, I’m going to carry you.”
“Ha! Ri–iiiii!” Zoro found himself abruptly in Sanji’s arms, supported by the knees and around the back. He wasn’t exactly a lightweight. When had Sanji gotten such upper body strength?
Sanji swept back into the infirmary and deposited Zoro on the bed. He took the drip bag and hung it back on the rack. He glared at Zoro. “You are not to move until Chopper says you can, understand?”
“Why do you care?”
“Why do I—” Sanji closed his eyes, hands balling into fists. When he opened them again, he gave Zoro a look that pinned him to the bed. “Because I feel the same way, dumbass. Now, do. Not. Move.”
Sanji pivoted on his heel and stormed from the infirmary.
Zoro was befuddled. What did that mean? That he felt the same way. The same way about what? Chopper wanting him to stay in bed?
Sometimes, Zoro didn’t understand Sanji.
Chopper finally released Zoro after what felt like an eternity and an infinity of tests. Zoro immediately began exercising to make up for all the time he’d been in bed and to try to make his skin thicker. He wasn’t going to let something stupid like that fell him again.
Up on the upper deck, away from everyone, Zoro lifted his weights over the edge of the ship. It was good to move again, to feel his muscles flexing and responding. Brook and Franky had set up an impromptu jam session below and the music wafted up to him. He could hear Jinbe, Luffy, Chopper, and Usopp’s cheers and attempts to join in singing. He hadn’t seen either of the girls lately, though he did find a bill tucked into his locker. He had no idea how he was going to pay it.
The tap of Sanji’s hard-soled shoes preceded his appearance. Wearing black and yellow, he carried a jug of water and also a jug of beer. Zoro stopped lifting, jumped off the rail, and set his weights aside. “You read my mind.”
“Not hard to do.” Sanji offered him both beverages and tucked the serving tray under his arm. He looked Zoro over from head to foot, then snorted. “Still pathetic.”
Zoro scowled. “Look who’s talking.”
Sanji arched his curled brow pityingly. “Keep telling yourself that.” He turned to go, but he stopped at Zoro’s words.
“I still want to know what you meant. That you felt the same way.”
Sanji’s shoulders bunched under his black suit coat. “You really are an idiot,” he muttered.
“Am not.” The retort sprung from Zoro’s lips automatically. “You’re the one who says weird, cryptic things and then expects everyone to understand.”
Back still to Zoro, Sanji lowered his chin and Zoro could see his arm move, indicating he was likely pinching the bridge of his nose. He sighed loudly and said in an almost inaudible voice, “If I keep waiting, I’m the one who’ll be dead.”
“What?! You’re dying?” Zoro’s heart leapt into his throat. He spun Sanji around, searching him for injuries. “What happened? Did you get bit, too? Why aren’t you in the infirmary?”
Sanji started laughing. Small at first, then it became big guffaws that caused tears in the corners of his eyes and him to bend at the waist. Zoro was concerned. “Is it some kind of laughing disease?”
This only seemed to make Sanji laugh harder. Zoro grew even more worried. He took the tray from Sanji, tossed it aside, and put his arm around Sanji’s waist. “C’mon. Let’s get you to Chopper.”
“No… stop… you stupid… marimo,” Sanji said between laughs and gasps for breath. He dug his heels in. Zoro could no longer move him.
Zoro debated on picking Sanji up, like he’d done to Zoro, but Sanji held out a halting hand to him, the other resting on his thigh, bent double, as he reigned his laughter under control.
Zoro let go of Sanji and folded his arms. “If you don’t explain, I’m going to throw you over my shoulder and take you to the infirmary.”
Sanji got himself together, dashing the tears from the corners of his eyes. He looked at Zoro as if he was the dumbest person on the planet. “I’m in love with you, stupid.”
Zoro blinked. Blinked again. “Wait, what?” What? “Really?” Really?
“Yes.” Sanji inhaled and sighed loudly. “I’ve been waiting for you to be comfortable enough to say something. You’re not one to demonstrate your emotions freely. I didn’t want to pressure you.”
“Didn’t want- wait- what?” Zoro’s thoughts ponged all over the place, and his heart was now hammering in his chest. “You love me?”
“Yes, Sanji. Love. You.” Sanji said it in caveman fashion. “You get it yet, shit swordsman?”
“Oh.” Oh. Oh! “Holy shit.” Holy shit. Sanji loved him.
“If I have to draw a diagram–urf!” Sanji’s words were cut off when Zoro grabbed him and planted a solid kiss on his lips. A beat later, and Sanji melted into him. Then they were fighting again, but in a new and more exciting way.
Sanji pulled back first, causing Zoro to mumble, “Ha-ha, I win.” He somehow got a kick to the back of the head even though Sanji was plastered to his front. “Hey!”
“Shut up. Let me go. You’re wrinkling my suit.”
“So?”
Sanji looked kiss-flushed and mussed. It was a good look on him. “So you’ve been silently holding onto your feelings for years and now you want to show the world?”
Sanji knew this whole time? “You knew this whole time?”
“Of course I knew, dumbass. I know everything about you.”
“Oh.” Zoro didn’t know what to say to that. It felt like he was flying and falling at once.
“Yeah, ‘oh.’” Sanji shook his head and extracted himself from Zoro’s arms. “I had to pry it out of you. I don’t want you to suddenly think this is a mistake.”
“I won’t.”
“You might- oi!”
Zoro ran to the edge of the upper deck and shouted down to the rock group gathered below. “Hey! I’m in love with Sanji.”
A chorus of “We know!” was shouted back at him.
Zoro turned bright red.
Sanji pressed his hand to his forehead. “What am I going to do with you?”
“Uh…”
Sanji closed the distance between them, took Zoro’s heated cheeks between his palms, and kissed him. “Go back to lifting weights. Dinner’s in two hours.”
He released Zoro, picked up his tray, and with another shake of his head, left the upper deck.
Zoro stood there, dumbly, for what felt like a long time. Then he started to grin. Sanji loved him! This was awesome! And it only took him nearly dying from a bug bite to find out.
Chopper had said it was a toxic pest, but Zoro now thought differently. It must’ve been a love bug.
End