Dear Angel

Bueno Vista Apartments
Sunnydale
CA

Angel Investigations
Hyperion Hotel
LA

Dear Angel

Sorry I have not been in touch for ages. But I have a terribly odd and I'm afraid, rather cheeky request to make of you. Please feel free to say no. I will totally understand if you do. You see I had to write a paper this year for the Council and it was rather well received, if I do say so myself. I enclose a copy with this, should you wish to peruse! As you will see, I wanted to do a study of something new and exciting. So I thought of HIM and the chip. What could be more exciting than a study on the effects of behaviour modifying chips on Vampires? So, to cut a long story short, they want me to come to England and present a synopsis of my paper at this year's Autumn Symposium. It's a great honour. So, and as I said please feel free to say no, but can I borrow him? To take with me? Can you imagine the impact...present my findings, then present him? Oh dear, it's too much to ask isn't it? But sending this in hope.

Yours, Giles

Rupert Giles
Bueno Vista Apartments
Sunnydale
CA

Giles

I've packed his stuff. Where do you want him?

Angel

Rupert Giles
Bueno Vista Apartments
Sunnydale CA

Hey You

Am I a soddin' piece of meat here?

Me

Angel Investigations
Hyperion Hotel
LA Dear Angel

I enclose a rather terse note from him. Do I take it the proposed trip is off?

Giles

Angel Investigations
Hyperion Hotel
LA

Dear Angel

The flight was fine. So all our worries came to nothing. We are installed at the headquarters of the Council, at the above address. You know, he really is a rather endearing creature when you get to know him isn't he? He's been showing me some extremely interesting new things. Hope all well with you. Tell Wesley he is not missing much at the Symposium!

Yours Giles

Rupert Giles
Chippingford Manor
Chipping Sodbury
Buckinghamshire

Giles

Do you actually remember Angelus?

Think about it.

Angel

Wesley Wyndham-Price
Angel Investigations
Hyperion Hotel
LA

Dear Wesley

Is there something you have not told me about Angel? I have just received the strangest...well, I can hardly call it a letter, from him. I enclose it. Oh, by the way, terribly exciting news, I've gone digital or something. Anyway, I have an email address. RGiles@h... Spike showed me how to! He really is a rather interesting creature...when you get beyond the rather odd facade. So, look forward to your thoughts reference Angel. I'm rather concerned. If you use the above, we can test it out!

Dear Angel

I'm afraid your last note completely lost me! Did I lose a page in the post? What do you think then? Email at last, thanks to Spike. As I said, he's been awfully interesting and helpful. Funny, you never mentioned he was either...ever?

Yours, Giles

Dear Giles

Oh dear. I was afraid I might have to explain this one day. Angel is…err…rather possessive of Spike. I really don't feel it's my place to say anymore. Ask one of them. Preferably Angel. I'm sure he will explain.

Yours, Wesley

Dear Giles

I'm sorry ref my last. I'm glad it's only...I mean I'm glad you have email.

Angel

Just watch it.

I did, when he was showering last night!

From: Angel@a...
Subject: Behaviour Modification Chip

Dear Giles

I think I forgot to mention before you left that his Chip can be rather unpredictable sometimes. DO NOT EVER be alone with him. You never know if it might fail. I have only your best interests at heart.

Yours, Angel

Gosh, I see what you mean. He is possessive. But I don't need to ask. I know exactly what it is. It's the Sire Childe thing isn't it? We saw it with Drucilla too. Do you think it would make an interesting study? We could write a joint paper?

Yours Giles

You will have to come back here one day.

They say travel broadens something...now what was it?

Wonderful suggestion. But to be honest Giles, I see enough of their...err relationship as it is. Give it a few more days and you might feel the same.

Wesley

Dear Giles

You know I've been reading your paper. It is fascinating. But do you know what? I think actually presenting HIM would totally ruin it's impact. No, I think you will get much more credit if you go it alone.

Angel

Dear Angel

We both found your last awfully amusing. William made a rather risqué comment about `going it alone'...but it won't be so funny in the telling. You had to be there I suppose. Of course, two bottles of Old Croft Original made it ever funnier I expect. We really are having a lovely time. But exhausting! Too many late nights. William says to send you his love.

All the best, Giles

I was wondering if you remember certain late nights. With me. In the factory?

Adam? Am I the only one who is fucking sane here?

Angel

Dear Wesley

Oh dear. I had an appalling note from Angel. So I did as you suggested and asked William. He has explained it all to me now. I am so sorry. It's awful. I had no idea. What are we going to tell Buffy? Gosh, I don't suppose most Vampires live long enough to get senile. And with most, you probably wouldn't notice creeping insanity anyway! How much is Angel aware of what is happening to him to you think? Oh, it's just all too sad. Do tell him we are both thinking of him. William particularly asks to be remembered to him.

Yours sadly, Giles

Funny that Mate, I was only tellin' Rupert `bout the factory the other night. We were both up. You know tossing...like you do when you can't sleep. We are finding sharing a room hard. Both of us...quite hard. It's coming to a head all the time. One of us is gonna erupt soon. Rupert said he'd give me a hand. To move. To get some relief. From him.

He enjoyed me factory stories too.

I know what you are trying to do. It won't work.

Dear Giles

I'm glad you and...William are having such a nice time. I am having a nice time too. Buffy dropped by yesterday, with Xander. What a surprise! Please particularly pass on Xander's regards to William.

Love Angel

Hey Bint

You are supposed to be on watch for me there. Where the fuck are you and what's happening?

Me

You had better answer this NOW or the stake won't be in your soddin' abdomen next time.

ME
AGAIN

I don't respond to threats. And anyway I've been busy entertaining Buffy. Angel's been all...you know...with Xander. So she's on her own.

NO I don't fucking know. What do you fucking mean? Doing what with Harris? Get down there NOW and see what they are doing.

NOW

You set me up. I hate you. They were in the bathroom with the door closed and there was a lot of grunting...work it out for yourself! Did I mention I hate Vampires?

He is a child. He is human. He is fat.

Surprisingly, it's all muscle when you see him undressed.

Dear Angel

I am so sorry to bring this up. I know you have troubles of your own...and not long...oh dear. Anyway, it seems you were right to warn me. But I didn't expect the malfunction to manifest itself in quite this way! I'm having a rather difficult time with him now. He seems awfully moody. Gosh, even tearful once or twice. Terrible embarrassing. Is this a prelude to something worse? Can you advise?

Do you remember Marcus then?

You mean dead, bald, Vampire Marcus? The one that I dusted?

Ok then, do you remember staple in your hand and blood being drained!!!

No. I don't. I remember large organ, broken back and roller-boy. Is that what you mean?

Can you tape Passions for me tonight?

Tape's already in.

I'm so sorry to have worried you Angel. He seems to have snapped out of it now! So all's well. In fact, he's been on top form. Taken a rather new, young member of the council under his wing. Imagine, Julian had never even met a Vampire before. You can imagine how fascinating they find each other. At least it gives me a good night's sleep, not having him in here with me all night! William says to tell you he's being good and showing Julian the ropes. He said you would be pleased to hear that, so I pass it on. Why he would use such a salty nautical expression is beyond me! Hope it makes sense to you! Do give my regards to Buffy and Xander if they are both still there.

Yours Giles.

☺

Good God man, I've been away for a few days. Only just got your last. I said ask Angel. Not the idiot. Disregard everything he told you. Angel is perfectly well. Maybe a bit depressed. But with Angel, as you know, it's rather hard to tell. But he is not, I repeat not, senile.

Wesley

You had better bring him back something really nice. I can't stand his moping any longer.

Cordy

Harris not keepin' him occupied then?

Xander was only here for the day, helping to build the hot tub for you. You did know about the hot tub didn't you? Shit. Tell me you knew, Angel'll kill me!

Dear Angel

I am terribly sorry about all the confusion but that's not why I'm sending this. There's been an incident. Quite ruined my presentation tomorrow. Spike is in custody of the Council they won't even let me see him. All I can get out of anyone is that he bit the new council member. Julian is badly hurt. So much for behaviour modification.

Awfully sorry, Giles

You need to speak to him. Now.

Angel

Oh dear oh dear. Julian was a complete impostor. He had a bit of a history apparently. Bit of a reputation for…dear me, you know…bit of an Oscar Wilde, if you get my meaning. But dangerous with it. William seems to have been defending himself! Well, what with his chip, I suppose he can't even defend himself against…that. Doesn't bear thinking about. Might as well be back at school. Anyway I just don't know what to tell Angel. William won't see me. (I don't blame him – how embarrassing for him). Please advise.

Giles

I've told Angel. Wait out.

Wes

End